halloween (work story)
due to the fact that we had lack of pumpkin carving contestants, i was forced against my will to participate in it. i walked into the kitchen and see my name written on the list by my supervisor. i gave in just because im the new hire, and wanted to gain new exposure to all the other high status brokers. it looks like i was up against 6 other participants who are all women in the higher age class, and including JANICE! she was on my tail. she vowed to her mothers grave that shell try and topple me in everything. not that extreme, but in that same context after i flipped her off in front of my coworkers. because i was the only guy in the contest, i was the underdog because these women are mothers that carve pumpkins for their kids every year for the past who-knows how-many years. they are experienced. i told them i never even touched a pumpkin before rather carve one. they only thing i knew about carving, is you cant use a traditional knife, you had to get a pumpkin carver that resembled a dull knife. i went to the supermarket hoping to get one for a dollar and they ran out, but instead i found a electric one for $5. it resembled a mini-jigsaw. i thought it could help me save some time due to the fact it would be 1 more thing in my already hectic work schedule. luckily, i found a 30 minute gap in my schedule to really do my carving. the night before i planned on carving a barfing pumpkin, but i saw georgeanna already took my idea. i couldnt carve the same, or else i would definitely lose for sure. so i had to think really quick because time was running out. we had till 12:30 to cast in all the ballots. so this is what i carved:
as everyone walked by to see, their first reactions were of shock because it sorta gave off a message of what this guy has in his mind. they were like "simon, you need help." or "simon, that is the ugliest pumpkin i have ever seen." or "simon, you are going to end up like those killers." in my mind i knew i lost because fuck, why are these old fuckers taking this so serisously. this is just a contest, and by the way, i didnt want to be in it anyways. other pumpkins were of cute "typical" designs a "typical" mom would carve, and fucking janice carved a smith barney logo. what an ass-kisser, because last year she won and she didnt wanna go down this year. at 1pm they announced the winner and i wasnt even in the conference room to know the results. i had so much work piled up. i heard on the loud speaker "simon, get your ass to tthe conference room. you won first." so i walk in and the whole company was clapping and all. i felt pretty accomplished and won myself a $100 to any westfield mall. new kid on the block wins the contest!
after work, me and some friends went to the west hollywood halloween parade since i have never been. all i gotta say is, it is well worth the experience. being west hollywood and right in the smack dab of boytown, you got homosexuals everywhere. i dont hate on homosexuals, as long as they dont try to do anything to me. and during the first 5 min upon arriving, i got hit on 3 times by dudes. good thing leti was there. there were so many people dressed up that, there was every costume you can think of. we left around 2am, and waking up in 3 hours didnt seem to phaze me.
i got ryan seacrest's check for his managed account:
